HONEST, now you can CHEAT for free!
HONEST, now you can CHEAT for free!
Copyright © 2007 by Ron Bauer
Senator Crandall's "Everything Fair Poker Deal" was to be one of the RBPS
Series, but it didn't make the cut. Instead,
Bruce Cervon and I were saving it for a
book we'd planned to write about Clarke
"The Senator" Crandall. Unfortunately,
several years of procrastination followed by Bruce's illness delayed our progress
on the book. Now that Bruce has passed
on, I doubt that I'll ever write and
publish it, mostly because he was the connection to Clarke's family who should
be part of the project, working title: "How to Add More
Magic to Your Comedy."
I have used this effect with some modificati
ons since the sixties when I got it from
Clarke. Only a few times did I ever teach it to anyone. Recently, though, one of
those with whom I shared this little master
piece decided to put it on the market
under his own name! As Clarke put it about
this kind of thing, it was "...copied
and pirated and pilfered... by chowderheads who even copied the instructions
So, go ahead and throw away twenty bucks, or read this for FREE. For a side-by-side comparison, read Cameron’s Comparison (PDF)
Senator Clarke Crandall's
EVERYTHING FAIR POKER DEAL
Edited version by Ron Bauer
Copyright © 2007 Ron Bauer
This is a very commercial poker deal, and about the only one that has a comedy premise.
I have used it for a long time and have
found it pleases and certainly entertains.
The plot is simple... You state that although many gamblers cheat, you NEVER do and
will prove it! You shuffle the deck, and a spectator cuts. You "fairly" deal two hands of
draw poker, but the spectator notices some
very suspicious actions. An additional two
spectators join the game, and through some quirk of fate, you just "happen" to get the
The first twenty cards are set up, which allows
any number of false shuffles and as the
top card is short, it may always be cut to the top after a cut. The deck may be set up and
in the pocket.
The set up consists of twenty cards.
To make it easier to set them up, pick out
the following cards: the Four Aces---The Four
Kings--the Four Queens--Three Jacks (you don't use the Jack of
Hearts) the Ten of
Spades and the two, three, four and five or Hearts.
The Ace of Hearts is the short card and goes face up first onto the table. Then as follows;
all face up onto the Ace of Hearts: 10S--2H--AS--AC---3H--QS--KS--4H--QD--KC--KD--KH--5H--JS--AD--QH--QC--JC--JD. Put this packet of twenty cards face down on the rest of the cards.
I keep the set up deck in the case and you're ready for a request by the audience for
"What would happen if you were to play in a regular poker game?"
My regular deck has been put away and I
bring out the set up deck and go to work.
NOTE: A deck with matching backs may be
used for some preliminary effect in
which the Ace of Hearts is forced. The deck is shuffled and placed in the pocket
alongside the set up deck. The selected card is named, and reaching into the
pocket, the Ace of Hearts is
removed and shown. The balance of the set up deck is
then taken from the pocket and you are ready for the poker deal.
- During this brilliant monologue, you have
false shuffled the deck keeping the top
twenty in order. An over hand shuffle,
taking the back half of the cards and
running them onto the other half is good. Cut the deck a few times and offer them
to the spectator to cut. Complete the cut and pick up the deck.
- As you say this, cut the short Ace to
the top. The above patter actually means
nothing, but it amuses me so I use it. No
matter what they say, hold the deck as
for dealing and continue.
- You will now "deal" two hands of cards. Instead of pushing cards off with your
left thumb, and taking them with your right hand, do this: Pick cards off the deck
by grasping them from above by the ends
with your thumb and second finger.
Always take one when dealing to your spectator's hand. For yours, though, you
count the necessary number by riffling up the inner end with your right thumb. By
keeping the deck away from you, almost
at arms length, you can easily glimpse
the number you're counting. As you place cards onto each hand, drop them from
about six or seven inches above the table.
The fact that you get TWO cards on the second deal may go unnoticed, but the
THREE and FOUR cards usually cause some comment. Pay no attention to what
anyone says. Continue dealing.
- Deal ONE card to your opponent and ONE to you.
- Deal ONE card to him and TWO to you.
- Deal ONE to him and THREE to you.
- Deal ONE to him and FOUR to you.
- On the last deal, ONE to him and THREE to you.
- Keep talking, no matter what
is said. Don't try to hide
the fact that several cards
are dealt to you---just plunk them down and keep going as if everything was fair.
NOTE: The deal has been... One and One - One and Two - One and Three - One
and Four - One and Three. You will have thirteen cards.
- Pick up your thirteen cards, spread them
out, look surprised or act it anyway, and
then say, brightly...
- Now this is the understatement of the year.
- Count the cards face down one at a
time, one onto the other until you have
counted five cards. This time, hold the
cards in left hand dealing position, and
take them with your right hand. On "six,"
push off all the cards above the bottom
one, and drop "it" onto the five cards. Don't try to conceal the fact that "it" is
more than one. Drop the last card onto the rest. Pick them up, discard the top two
cards. Spread the remainder and say...
- Count them exactly as you did in Step 7. Discard two cards.
- Again go through the motions as per Step 7, and discard two cards.
- Count your remaining cards, one at a time, face down onto each other. Discard the
top two, which will leave you with five cards
as required for the classic game of
Draw Poker. Pick up the remaining five
cards, holding them as you would in a
regular poker game. You will have the QC, QH, AS, QS, and KS in your hand. If
you don't have these cards, stop the trick and go into bird calls. Turn the AS and
the KS face down on the table and the
three Queens face up beside them.
- He will have the QD, 3H, 2H, AH, and JS in his hand. He could draw two cards,
but you give him no chance to do it. Insist
he get a new hand from the cards you
have thrown away. He will be able to
assemble a full house: three Kings and two
Aces. This is a good hand, and beats what you have in sight.
- Turn to a second spectator and give him
the eight cards from the table. He will
easily find five good cards among them. In fact, he can't help himself. The Ace,
Two, Three, Four, and Five of Hearts are staring him in the face! His discards will
be the QD, JS, and 10S.
- Pick up the three discarded cards. Show
the QD but keep the other two hidden,
with the faces towards you.
- Pick up all your cards, plus
the three discards. Your four of a kind threat won't
scare the fellow with the straight heart flush and the original player with the full
house won't be worried. Look thru the eight cards, faces towards you, of course
and discard the three queens, keeping them
face down. This will leave you with a
fat, black Royal Flush in Spades. This will do as a hand until a better one comes
along. Turn to a third player and say...
- Give the third player the
three cards and two more from
the top of the balance of
the deck. You have thrown away the three Queens and he will get two Jacks from
the deck which will give him a nice full
house. You are now ready for the climax.
COMMENT: The pace should move briskly, or
not too slow anyway. Keep talking and
learn the effect. It's not too complicated
and you'll have no trouble remembering it. If
you have any sense of showmanship at all, you
can keep their interest and above all, you
will have entertained them as well. Good
luck to you with the "EVERYTHING FAIR
MAGICAL ENTERPRISES INCORPORATED
Clarke THE SENATOR Crandall
54 W. Randolph St.
Chicago 1, Ill.
Copyright © 2007 by Ron Bauer